CoveyOfCockneys

NEVER GO UP AGAINST A QUICK THINKER

No doubt you've heard of Cockney “Quick Wit and Ready Repartee”.  If you haven’t, I’m not the one who is going to explain it to you, it’s the kind of remark best explained face to face.

But my subject today is not so much Quick Wit, as “Quick Thinking”, and if you want to find out about that, then there’s mountains of information on the Internet.  Of course, most of it is totally nutty and useless including the advice to: Never stifle a yawn; try chewing gum or maybe give Pokemon Go a whirl.

Nevertheless, it does give some obvious tidbits such as: “Processing speed is defined as the time it takes your brain to take in new information, reach some judgment on it, and then formulate a response”.  Wow! Whoever wrote that is no Quick Thinker!

There are a couple of Mr. Google chestnuts worth remarking on, namely: “Faster thinking can help you in many aspects of life.” And “When people are required to think quickly, they report feeling happier, more energetic, more creative, and more self-confident”.

But to really understand the scope of “Quick Thinking” you need to do no more than look over the shoulder of a Master as he uses his inborn ability to “Just Do It”.

Naturally, I’m talking about LB and an incident that happened when we were all younger and the earth was cooler.  This story involves his love of animals, and Sam, the second Airedale terrier in his household.  

Sam was a wonderfully lovable dog; he was the reason for LB’s hair perm and the star of the one-time dog show.  He was also an escape artist and a bit of a wanderer.  

Mainly he liked to trot off to the local McDonalds where he would sit with a totally untrue hungry look, until some vulnerable animal lover would fall for his tricks and buy him a Big-Mac. Most times his escape was noticed and a quick retrieval from his hamburger heaven was accomplished.  

   But then it happened. One day he’d escaped and couldn’t be found.

          A day passed. Everyone in the family was worried.  But no news is good news.  After all, he was a pure-pedigreed dog, totally micro-chipped and identified with his name and telephone number on his dog tag.  Surely if he had been found someone would have notified the Humane Society.

          Two days passed. Hallelujah, he had been found.  

Well, not found exactly, more “opportunistically rescued” shall we say, from his McDonalds soliciting stand. The Finder, rather than taking him to or calling the Humane Society had held onto Sam while she considered her options.  

Obviously, this was a dog worth some money.  How much she wondered?  She called the number on his dog-tag.  

Fortunately, she spoke to LB.  She had the dog and would return it for a reward. “Wonderful” said LB.  “Would $100.00 be sufficient?”  You bet it would, (remember this was a time when $100.00 could buy Sam 40 BigMacs at $2.50 a pop). Finally, a meeting was arranged for exchange.  Sam was ecstatic to see LB.  The Finder?  Well, she wasn’t quite so ecstatic to see the $100.00 donation receipt from the Humane Society that LB gave to her as her reward.

          It’s very hard to best a “Quick Thinker”!